"Trapped By One's Possessions...."

 

“Trapped By One’s Possessions; In Full Surrounded By ‘Things’; Inundated By ‘Stuff’…But, What To Do ?”

 

 

08/21/12/

 

 

To my very, dearest and wonderful friends, and constant, loyal readers,

 

In the consideration of Human Values, among them is the driving need first, to own one’s own home, and second, to embellish, and decorate therein to our unique tastes; this—I believe—is done to personalize our abodes, to make of them our own, to set them apart from nearly all others, and, to make an individual statement that states to the world that, ‘This is MY Home’, my sense of place, and placement within the community’.

 

Even within a multi-family building of condominiums, though the outside appearance of one, is but a ‘cookie cutter’ design to the other, the need to individualize one’s own home is particularly strong.

 

We want our homes to be comfortable for us, and for anyone visiting; we want our surroundings to reflect our ‘taste’, our social ranking, and, by default, the amount of disposable income we have for such pursuits.

 

Above and beyond mere decoration, are those collections of like items that please us, or that we believe will—in time—gain intrinsic and monetary value.

 

But, dear friends…we mostly gather ‘stuff’ together because the objects please us, or hark-back to happier times, or, simply, because we think of them as ‘pretty’.

 

Time (and available finances!) is the enemy in a number of ways.

1)           All the time, whether in magazines, or on TeeVee, or on-line, or even, visiting someone else’s domicile, we are constantly exposed to thousands upon thousands of ‘things’, whether we may like them or not.

2)           Time is the enemy regarding cost, as—for example—should one admire a particular piece of furniture, painting, or antique, the funds available to purchase these things is ranked—by economic necessity—well-below the need to buy food, pay utilities, bills, credit card debt, mortgages, car payments, insurance, clothing, etc.  For the most part, there is really very little by way of available funds to buy art, or to indulge in hobbies.

3)           Time is further the enemy, in that—over time—such ‘collections’ tend to grow, to generalize, and to eventually take over living space.

4)           And, as alluded to above, Time is the enemy of order and purpose, as often—over time—one’s interests naturally shift and change; the collection of five years ago is probably abandoned, and gathering dust, while ever newer collections are acquired.

5)           Beyond that which is purely functional, and/or necessary, like stoves, beds, sofas, still, even among those items that may evidence brand loyalty, the color, shape, and appearance is often as seriously considered as is suitable function; should you long—say—for a ‘Mixmaster’ all-in-one blender, there remains the choice of the various colors it comes in.

 

I have—usually accompanied by a friend—always enjoyed going to the different, ‘Parade Of Homes’, to see how they have been professionally decorated; further, one of my so-called hobbies is to look on the internet at homes for sale.

 

What I have found most interesting, is my reaction to whether the homes are decorated, have furniture and curtains in them, as opposed to merely looking at empty rooms.

 

In that regard, should the architecture—itself—not be able to sway, I find empty interiors to be quite bland, bereft of any personality, and—dearest friends—these homes quickly begin to look alike, and to lose their identity.

 

And I always find it amazing what people do to ‘personalize’ their living spaces in terms of type of furniture and decoration, as well as item placement.

 

I find it somewhat sad and depressing to see an empty house, devoid of character, and usually quite devoid of charm!

 

I’ve seen some personal decorative effects that tend to run to various mirrors, and paintings-on-velvet of either Elvis, small children with really BIG eyes, or, biblical scenes.  And while that is not my own preference, it was once someone’s who lived there.

 

And while though the lawns, and yards, and garden plantings may look beautiful…outside, a boring, and predictable interior causes me to look elsewhere.

 

And, for those of you, my very dearest friends who might share this interest, I particularly like the ‘virtual tours’, by which a video, steady-cam is moved throughout the house; to me, it is almost like being there.

 

But, beyond the acquisition of such utilitarian items as, say, bedroom furniture, or dining sets, and individual's sense of ownership is very often clearly marked by how the home has been decorated.

 

And so, frequently, as the home is lived in for year after year, decorative items tend to revolve-around like items, themes, or sets.

 

6)            Given sufficient funds with which to do so, this is how ‘collections’ are born, which are—for the most part—interesting, and innocent.

 

However two things seem inevitably to happen;

1)           Too much of one theme is purchased over time, and displayed. (collections, with the intention of their increasing in value, to be—perhaps—sold at a later date) tend to get particularly out of hand.

2)           Then too, often over time, one’s interests change, resulting in not one or two collections, but too many, that eat up space, and cannot be stored properly, displacing room in the house that could be better utilized in the intended or assumed original purpose of the space.

3)           The most difficult challenge of creating collections in hopes of monetary gain, is that one is compelled to try to purchase every permutation of, and sets of a particular theme.

 

I once knew an ex-co-worker who began to collect limited edition, ‘Emmett Kelly’ clowns.  Then, she began to collect Barbie dolls, clothes, cars, and houses; her next collection was comprised of anything that was related to “Star Wars”.

 

Finally…I believe she began to collect ‘Beanie Babies’, until she had hundreds!  Clearly, her collecting—while, maybe well-intended—grew, and grew in size, taking up all her closet room, and filling her second bedroom.

 

Now, mind you, in order to try to garner value over time, these sets had to remain pristine, still sealed in the box, and untouched (and to me, unenjoyed).  She became driven, out of focus, and her ‘collections’ took over most of her social life, as well as consuming tons of money.

 

Even eclectic collections can so easily get out of control; a dear friend of mine, and his wife—along with another coupe they knew—used to spend every Saturday going to estate, and garage-sales.

 

The night before, they would get a city map, and the local newspaper, and spend hours plotting out a plan of attack, so that their progress covered the most circuitous route, depending on listed items available for sale, and location.

 

Upon arising early, Saturday morning, they first would stop for breakfast, and further compare notes, and estimated times for arrival and departure, and how long they wanted to stay at any one place.  It was as calculated as a military campaign.

 

Even as disciplined as they were, still—in time—the house became full, as did the garage (so much so, that a fully five foot high assemblage of boxes displaced the couple’s car, relegating it ‘off street’ parking.

 

Finally, to save themselves from drowning in ‘stuff’, they adopted the “one thing in, one thing out’ policy.  But to this day, the garage is so piled up, that they—themselves—no longer exactly know what is in each box!

 

The other couple—their friends—fared even worse.  Guided not by any plan, design or restraint, they simply bought, on impulse anything that happened to appeal to them.  In time the garage and the house was full; so full was the house that mostly meaningless stuff was stacked in layers, until mere pathways marked the way to the kitchen, the bathroom, and the bedrooms.

 

And…it did not end there!  I was told that—recently—the couple purchased ANOTHER house, wherein to store everything.  At this point, I think I would be justified in describing their behavior as impulsive, hoarding, cluttering, too expensive, without any common theme or design, and, frankly, silly.  But this happens more often than one might think.

 

My ‘collecting’—in general—seems to be eclectic, mixing purchased with ‘found’, or re-purposed items; I tend to veer towards the antique, the Victorian, with different knick-knacks, statues, pediments, and furniture obtained, and arranged for ease of viewing, and the overall effect they lend to the house.

 

Since I live in a double-wide, mobile home with two bedrooms, and two baths, space is at a premium, at only 960 sq. ft. Placement and balance are most important; too much, and the effect is scattered, uncomfortable, and too distracting.  Plus, any rogue accumulation of ‘stuff’ proves difficult to move, and almost impossible to clean!

 

Personally, I would rather have ten ‘nice’ things, than a hundred mediocre things…or a thousand, awful things!

 

And now—of course—available money to spend on ‘trifles’, or on random, disconnected things is scarce, and that in itself tends to put the brake on sheer impulse buying.

 

One of my biggest problems (since becoming disabled), is that I cannot thoroughly clean my own home, and must hire someone (usually a neighbor) to mop and vacuum the floors, dust the furniture, and tops, and insides of picture frames…really, anything out in plain sight that is a dust magnet.

 

For just amassing a ton of stuff without a plan, or without purpose, or order just looks undisciplined and dusty, and—subsequently—very out of place!

 

Regrettably, my dearest friends, and ever-loyal readers, I must confess to being a major ‘clutterer’, and having an Olympic Gold in being both a pack-rat, AND a hoarder; when I first moved back home with my mother and father, I brought-along a gigantic storage space worth of books, magazines, drawings, letters, furniture, art, found objects, and assorted object d-art.  And although I had NO room for any of it here, I paid storage fees for years, and watched as they raised, and raised again, the rental fees, until I had to have a friend (as I would have chickened-out, wanting to keep everything!) call, and meet an auction house to empty out, completely, the storage unit.

 

During the time my folks lived here, the house was already maxxed-out in terms of any, possible room for things of mine.  There was not room for one more book, or one more knick-knack.  The closets were full to brimming, and the built-in cabinets in the dining room were equally full…so much so, that even finding one, particular thing was nigh impossible.

 

When I had moved my upright piano into the house from storage, it displaced a loveseat in the living room.

 

And, if you may imagine, a mobile home is very much like a small apartment; shelves, and storage is at a bare minimum.

 

Some two years ago (while I still had some money) I found that my home needed a number of pricey repairs to the floor, and to the ceiling.  And as my wonderful mom and dad had told me that, upon my inheriting it, the house was mine to do with as I saw fit. Still, a couple of years passed before I began to make repairs, and to think of what ‘look’ I wanted for the home that had become mine.

 

For months and months, I thought about different things, trying to decide on a ‘game plan’ to work around.  Some of the changes wrought were intentional, while many others were the logical consequence of making drastic repairs that were needed.

 

Up and out came the old, wall-to-wall carpet that was probably fifteen years old, and, frankly, nasty.  Instead, I had bamboo laminate installed everywhere, except the kitchen, the bathrooms, and one closet.  I chose a very light, yellow-colored laminate for the floors which was trimmed with crown and foot molding.

 

The main bathroom got gutted, except for the tub, and the wallboard.  Sheet linoleum was installed there, as well as a repurposed mirror over the sink, and wall sconce lights to each side of a new basin, and cabinet.

 

And while I am becoming more and more pleased with the results so far, the remodeling is in no way over.  And, keeping close to my pack-rat nature, both walk-in closets are packed with boxes, and I must confess to you, dear friends, that I cannot now remember what is in exactly what box!

 

So…that’s about where I am in the process of redesigning my home to suit me.  I am not above spending tons of time on the internet for items that are close-outs, discontinued models, drastic sales, or even, ‘scratch and dent’ sales, as long as the damage is minimal, and can be successfully hidden.

 

Hopefully in time, my dearest friends, I hope to transform this place into ‘my’ home, ‘my statement’, ‘my’ story, ‘my’ saga.  I want to be able to look about my home (especially since I spend so very much time inside!), and be pleased with the results, and the effects I want to create.

 

But, I want my home to be inviting and comfortable; no museum ropes here!  My furniture is intended to be lounged-upon, with shoes off, of course!

 

As slowly—now—as I continue to acquire things, I strive, ever, for harmony, flow, attention to detail, and…peaceable.

 

I further want my ‘refuge’ to be safe, comfortable, and as individualistic to my own taste as can be accomplished.

 

Granted, the ‘outside’ look of the house makes it look kind of like a shack, but this—too—is well-intended; for in THIS neighborhood, with its crime, arson, robbery, and vandalism, I purposely want it to look as if I have nothing worth stealing inside.  As an example, for nearly thirty years, my folks had a small statue of a woman, demurring pouring water from a jug. In fact, my late father used to jokingly call it, “The Lady With The Jugs”.

 

After the repair work had been done to the outside of the house, the statue was moved to the outside of the front hedge where it could not be seen, really.  However, that did not stop someone from idly breaking off the head of the statue!  The sheer destructive mindlessness of that act floored me, made me angry, and—truth be told—very much saddened my heart, as it was SO unnecessary.

 

So…once more, that little statue graces the front yard, only I have intentionally left its broken-off head rest at its feet, as a reminder to all, but probably most to myself, that we are ever surrounded by little evils which help extinguish part of the joy of that which is good.

 

My questions of the day to you, my dearest friends are:

1)           Do you presently live in a home, apartment, or mobile home?

2)           What have you done to your living space that reflects your likes and dislikes?

3)           To what do your tastes run?

4)           What image do you want a visitor to experience upon first entering your abode?  And, exiting?

5)           What kind of furniture do you like? 

6)           What color palette do you prefer?

7)           What about rugs, and window treatments?  Mimi-blinds, shaded, curtains, or any in combination?

8)           How would you describe your kitchen?  Your bathroom(s)?

9)           If you could, what elements about your present abode would you most like to change?

10)    Are you happy where you are now?  Or, would you rather relocate?

11)    How do you want your guests, or visitors to feel while in your home?

Please enter your remarks in the ‘comment’ section below.  If you can, please feel quite free to share photographs of your living spaces, if possible.

 

Don’t forget…even your day-dreamed imaginations of what might be are also quite valid.

 

Everyone has their own, unique visions; all have different tastes, and probably most of us have tiny budgets!  Please let me know how you feel!

 

And—as always—please, please know that I love you most dearly!

 

 

‘Zahc’/Charles