| Feb 09 2012 |
"The Pain That Was Mine, The Darkness, And The Hope "
‘The Darkness"...Part II Of III ; Part III to follow on 02/11/12 .
By ‘Shawn'
02/09/12
To my wonderfully dear, dear friends, and ever-constant, patient readers,
[ please refer to my diary entry of 02/07/12 for explanation ]
II
' The Darkness ‘
Even as I closed my eyes for the last time and fell into a momentary quiet, even then, the darkness began to gather, and close in around me.
{I knew what I had done, and fully knew that it was through my soul's eyes that I saw it gather.}
I was briefly distracted by the recollection of my old life. It was like a two-second slide show that spanned every second, every year. I saw
events, people, and places that I had previously forgotten: being held by my mother for the first time; elementary school; my siblings; Christmases; my first friend; my first love.
events, people, and places that I had previously forgotten: being held by my mother for the first time; elementary school; my siblings; Christmases; my first friend; my first love.
All this was displayed to me as one scene passed into another and then faded from awareness.
In that cold darkness, I felt alone. All alone and yet...not alone. It was not a pleasant feeling, and I began to sweat despite the cold.
Overhead, there was a limitless sky but no stars.
I knew then what it was like to be truly alone. I called and called your names, but the sound was carried away by the chilling breeze.
The ground I walked on became more uncertain. I would have lost my footing many times, on the sharp rocks.
For an endless age I walked. In the distance, the hills and low mountains were briefly lit by fire, but I could not feel any warmth from it. I stumbled on, tearing my clothes.
My path narrowed, spanning valleys that got deeper and deeper. I was lost, and would have given everything I had, or was, or would ever hope to be to return to the safety of my family.
It was then I heard it...a low, moaning sound carried on the wind; it was so
plaintive and full of regret, and I felt sorry for that lost regret.
plaintive and full of regret, and I felt sorry for that lost regret.
The sound grew larger, and changed. And got louder and louder. It was the roiling sound of terror, agony, and endless suffering of countless souls.
I would have tried to help them, but knew that I could not.
I froze in icy horror as an evil, laughing voice said, " That's right. Come to us Shawn, we are waiting for you. "
And I began to run, knowing that if I fell, I would fall among them, never to escape. Every pain I had had in life was nothing so much as this.
And the agony of terror began to tear at me leaving bleeding sores that would never heal.
End
of Part II of III
Part III, and comments to follow on: 02/11/12
Meanwhile, my most dear, selfless friends, and always kind, a loyal readers, please allowme to wish for you days of lessened of no pain; freedom from want, or need; quiet evenings, free from depression or despairing; and a night of blissful, and restorative sleep, that gives you strength, and a clearer mind to be as allies to always look to do that which is good...and Just.
And, for all the happiness that your hearts can hold !
I love you,
‘Zahc'
| Feb 09 2012 |
"The Pain That Was Mine, The Darkness, And The Hope "
‘The Darkness"...Part II Of III ; Part III to follow on 02/11/12 .
By ‘Shawn'
02/09/12
To my wonderfully dear, dear friends, and ever-constant, patient readers,
[ please refer to my diary entry of 02/07/12 for explanation ]
II
' The Darkness ‘
Even as I closed my eyes for the last time and fell into a momentary quiet, even then, the darkness began to gather, and close in around me.
{I knew what I had done, and fully knew that it was through my soul's eyes that I saw it gather.}
I was briefly distracted by the recollection of my old life. It was like a two-second slide show that spanned every second, every year. I saw
events, people, and places that I had previously forgotten: being held by my mother for the first time; elementary school; my siblings; Christmases; my first friend; my first love.
events, people, and places that I had previously forgotten: being held by my mother for the first time; elementary school; my siblings; Christmases; my first friend; my first love.
All this was displayed to me as one scene passed into another and then faded from awareness.
In that cold darkness, I felt alone. All alone and yet...not alone. It was not a pleasant feeling, and I began to sweat despite the cold.
Overhead, there was a limitless sky but no stars.
I knew then what it was like to be truly alone. I called and called your names, but the sound was carried away by the chilling breeze.
The ground I walked on became more uncertain. I would have lost my footing many times, on the sharp rocks.
For an endless age I walked. In the distance, the hills and low mountains were briefly lit by fire, but I could not feel any warmth from it. I stumbled on, tearing my clothes.
My path narrowed, spanning valleys that got deeper and deeper. I was lost, and would have given everything I had, or was, or would ever hope to be to return to the safety of my family.
It was then I heard it...a low, moaning sound carried on the wind; it was so
plaintive and full of regret, and I felt sorry for that lost regret.
plaintive and full of regret, and I felt sorry for that lost regret.
The sound grew larger, and changed. And got louder and louder. It was the roiling sound of terror, agony, and endless suffering of countless souls.
I would have tried to help them, but knew that I could not.
I froze in icy horror as an evil, laughing voice said, " That's right. Come to us Shawn, we are waiting for you. "
And I began to run, knowing that if I fell, I would fall among them, never to escape. Every pain I had had in life was nothing so much as this.
And the agony of terror began to tear at me leaving bleeding sores that would never heal.
End
of Part II of III
Part III, and comments to follow on: 02/11/12
Meanwhile, my most dear, selfless friends, and always kind, a loyal readers, please allowme to wish for you days of lessened of no pain; freedom from want, or need; quiet evenings, free from depression or despairing; and a night of blissful, and restorative sleep, that gives you strength, and a clearer mind to be as allies to always look to do that which is good...and Just.
And, for all the happiness that your hearts can hold !
I love you,
‘Zahc'
| Feb 09 2012 |
"The Pain That Was Mine, The Darkness, And The Hope "
‘The Darkness"...Part II Of III ; Part III to follow on 02/11/12 .
By ‘Shawn'
02/09/12
To my wonderfully dear, dear friends, and ever-constant, patient readers,
[ please refer to my diary entry of 02/07/12 for explanation ]
II
' The Darkness ‘
Even as I closed my eyes for the last time and fell into a momentary quiet, even then, the darkness began to gather, and close in around me.
{I knew what I had done, and fully knew that it was through my soul's eyes that I saw it gather.}
I was briefly distracted by the recollection of my old life. It was like a two-second slide show that spanned every second, every year. I saw
events, people, and places that I had previously forgotten: being held by my mother for the first time; elementary school; my siblings; Christmases; my first friend; my first love.
events, people, and places that I had previously forgotten: being held by my mother for the first time; elementary school; my siblings; Christmases; my first friend; my first love.
All this was displayed to me as one scene passed into another and then faded from awareness.
In that cold darkness, I felt alone. All alone and yet...not alone. It was not a pleasant feeling, and I began to sweat despite the cold.
Overhead, there was a limitless sky but no stars.
I knew then what it was like to be truly alone. I called and called your names, but the sound was carried away by the chilling breeze.
The ground I walked on became more uncertain. I would have lost my footing many times, on the sharp rocks.
For an endless age I walked. In the distance, the hills and low mountains were briefly lit by fire, but I could not feel any warmth from it. I stumbled on, tearing my clothes.
My path narrowed, spanning valleys that got deeper and deeper. I was lost, and would have given everything I had, or was, or would ever hope to be to return to the safety of my family.
It was then I heard it...a low, moaning sound carried on the wind; it was so
plaintive and full of regret, and I felt sorry for that lost regret.
plaintive and full of regret, and I felt sorry for that lost regret.
The sound grew larger, and changed. And got louder and louder. It was the roiling sound of terror, agony, and endless suffering of countless souls.
I would have tried to help them, but knew that I could not.
I froze in icy horror as an evil, laughing voice said, " That's right. Come to us Shawn, we are waiting for you. "
And I began to run, knowing that if I fell, I would fall among them, never to escape. Every pain I had had in life was nothing so much as this.
And the agony of terror began to tear at me leaving bleeding sores that would never heal.
End
of Part II of III
Part III, and comments to follow on: 02/11/12
Meanwhile, my most dear, selfless friends, and always kind, a loyal readers, please allowme to wish for you days of lessened of no pain; freedom from want, or need; quiet evenings, free from depression or despairing; and a night of blissful, and restorative sleep, that gives you strength, and a clearer mind to be as allies to always look to do that which is good...and Just.
And, for all the happiness that your hearts can hold !
I love you,
‘Zahc/Charles'
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